Michael Thiele is a woodsmith who makes musical instruments and playable furniture. He spends most of his life either in the shop or out on the road buying wood and selling his work at craft shows. In recent years, his travels have begun to inspire his own writing, so he sends me his thoughts.
May First
Yeah, I know it’s not the first day of April. April Fools day, that is. But do they really think I’m that stupid? The sign on the exit gate at my motel this morning was not bolted to the thing as a joke. The wind’s been heckling it for years as evidenced by sand pelt. “Stand back,” it says. “Risk of serious injury or death.”
Let me offer a clue. In this realm I have a very low gullibility quotient. I watched the gate open and close on autotrack just once for laughs. As I watched it move at approximately .05 miles per hour I wondered just who the sign was directed at. Snails? Reminds me of the guy who walks out on his porch one morning and sees a snail, which he promptly kicks off the porch and across the lawn near the fence. One year later to the day he walks out again and spots a snail standing on the same spot. It looks up at him and says, “Why’d you do that?” Maybe the sign is directed at dead cats. No, that couldn’t be right. I mean, they’re already dead. On the other hand, dead things move pretty slow……..
I’m in Albuquerque. Well actually, I’m leaving Albuquerque. Stayed here last night. It’s now time for Kansas City, St. Louis and Indianapolis. Three art shows in a row. Done with Florida. Couldn’t stand the place in May, anyway. I’m from Arizona where humidity is proscribed by law. We don’t mind sweating, but we don’t believe our sweat should sweat. Sweat squared is wrong. Against the law here. Not the only strange law we’ve passed, though. Ask the women.
I’m out……
Let me offer a clue. In this realm I have a very low gullibility quotient. I watched the gate open and close on autotrack just once for laughs. As I watched it move at approximately .05 miles per hour I wondered just who the sign was directed at. Snails? Reminds me of the guy who walks out on his porch one morning and sees a snail, which he promptly kicks off the porch and across the lawn near the fence. One year later to the day he walks out again and spots a snail standing on the same spot. It looks up at him and says, “Why’d you do that?” Maybe the sign is directed at dead cats. No, that couldn’t be right. I mean, they’re already dead. On the other hand, dead things move pretty slow……..
I’m in Albuquerque. Well actually, I’m leaving Albuquerque. Stayed here last night. It’s now time for Kansas City, St. Louis and Indianapolis. Three art shows in a row. Done with Florida. Couldn’t stand the place in May, anyway. I’m from Arizona where humidity is proscribed by law. We don’t mind sweating, but we don’t believe our sweat should sweat. Sweat squared is wrong. Against the law here. Not the only strange law we’ve passed, though. Ask the women.
I’m out……
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