Michael's Chronicle: East Window

Michael Thiele is a woodsmith who makes musical instruments and playable furniture. He spends most of his life either in the shop or out on the road buying wood and selling his work at craft shows. In recent years, his travels have begun to inspire his own writing, so he sends me his thoughts.

East Window
April Something

I need daily sunrise eclipses outside my east window. Having the sun in my eyes is a lousy way to wake up. Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s only a ten minute torture but that’s ten too many in my book. I don’t think it’s too much to ask. I’d almost prefer a glow in the dark rooster - a living combination night light and alarm clock. Perhaps I could get one with altered vocal cords. Better yet, one who can’t keep time or is slow to respond to light. That way I’d already be up before he goes off. If I get the jumbo version I can put him in a coop just outside the window so even if they deny my request for sunrise eclipses he’ll block the incoming light.

They say that animals respond oddly to total eclipses. I say who cares if the prairie dogs are doing back flips or the scorpions are voluntarily drowning themselves? Is it any skin off my back that the ants are square dancing in my front yard? All Dogs creatures deserve a little fun time. Morning at eclipse time gives them all something to look forward to. Maybe it will turn army ants into peace ants and the prairie dogs can finally qualify for the rodent Olympics. I don’t care about any of that, really. I just want the morning sun out of my eyes. Is that too much to ask?

How about a mid-morning sunrise? Now there’s a novel solution. I like to think out of the box (no, not the cereal box - I’m really not flakey). Yeah, that’s it. I’ll concede daily sunrise eclipses for mid-morning sunrise. There’ll be less rush hour car wrecks caused by people driving in to work in an easterly direction. They’ll already be seated at their computers or wrenching their wrenches when the sun shows up - safe and indoors. No need for altered roosters, but the prairie dogs and army ants lose their eclipse benefits. The scorpions will appreciate not drowning themselves.

Thinking this way is tedious. Blame it on the sunrise (earlier each day by the way). Perhaps I’ll just install some curtains or learn to use my blinds. Who says you can’t teach an old dog new tricks?

Later